In a perfect world you would have a Miss Universe answer to every question…
But is the answer right?
In the past 3 years I have seen that in my own life, the lives of those around me and in society in general the most destructive and hurtful thing one can do to each other is the need to be right.
From stupid little personal indifferences to larger issues of politics, religion, abortion, economy, climate change, you name it – being right is mandated. But the result? Hatred, violence and warfare.
Imagine a Democrat acknowledging to a Republican that their own opinion wasn’t substantiated by fact as much as belief?
In a perfect world right?
Yes there are times when it’s important to stand for what is right when it comes to issues of injustice. But if you think about it racism, xenophobia and unfair discrimination birthed from hating those who look, think and act different than the “norm”.
Before you argue or voice an opinion, do you ask yourself: Why am I right? Why do I believe that my view is the right view, when one can view something from so many angles?
Disagreements don’t digest well and Miss Universe textbook answers are probably the trend but the reality is that our issues are complex and we have the right to feel, but what we feel may not necessarily always be right.
A few nights ago I asked God, how can I truly be free? I felt He said to me that the key to freedom is sonship. Sonship comes by knowing who you are. But the key to sonship is humility. And humility comes by denying the self – the need to always wanting to be right.
What we belief or feel might be valid, but it doesn’t make what someone else who think differently than you necessarily wrong. Once again are you willing to listen? Are you willing to put yourself in someone else’s shoes and see things from their point of view.
Today I give up the right to be right.
In my own life I’ve seen that the need to prove myself right or prove anything to other people, is often a projection of cracks in my self-belief.
But I have seen transformation when I gave up the need to be right all the time and by denying the self(ego).
And you know what? Being happy feels way better than being right.
A happier person is a more considerate person. A more considerate person is open to what others have to say.
Man oh man, it’s a process and living humbly is bloody hard. But I love what Desmond Tutu said in a speech to the United Nations Commission on Human Rights in Geneva in 2001:
“We need so much to work for coexistence, for tolerance, and to say, “I disagree with you, but I will defend to the death your right to your opinion.” It is only when we respect even our adversaries and see them not as ogres, dehumanized, demonized, but as fellow human beings deserving respect for their personhood and dignity, that we will conduct a discourse that just might prevent conflict. There is room for everyone; there is room for every culture, race, language and point of view.”
When you truly know who you are you can stil engage in dialog and give constructive input but walk away feeling good, even though someone disagrees with your opinions.
Not only do I want to give up being right but I also want to publicly apologise for anyone that I offended or disagreed with because we didn’t see eye to eye or view things the same.
Remember there is only one group of people that think they are always right, they are called assholes.
Currently listening to: Give a little bit – Supertramp